Scars under the skin
by R5Fanatic
Summary: Puck's troubled past and present keeps haunting him. Finally he gets checked into a hospital where he meets Rachel. Soon they both find themselves turning to each other in the darkest of times in both of their lives. PUCKLEBERRY AU.
1. Chapter 1

AU Puckleberry

**I only own the story plot. Enjoy!**

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"Everyone!" The head doctor, Miss Cat said, "We have a new patient joining us. He's a little sensitive, been through a lot so I hope you give him enough space, yet be helpful and friendly at the same time." She gestured towards the door, where a tall, Mohawked boy stood. He couldn't be older than 18 at most, he was staring everybody in the eye, showing that he wasn't afraid but that didn't fool Rachel. She'd seen all different types of cases, her Dad was the therapist here and she'd been coming here since she was ten. Now that she was 16, she could actually help and volunteer.

He stalked forward and stood beside the doctor, "Would like you like to introduce yourself, Noah?" He glared at her and said,

"No one calls me Noah, only Puck or Puckerman." She pressed her lips together, she didn't like taking gruff from the patient but she just nodded her head and put on a smile for everyone else. "I'm Puck or Puckerman. I'm the resident badass at McKinley High and I'm not giving up that title. I don't take shit from anyone. So. Keep out of my way, and I'll keep out of yours." He said. Everyone looked around awkwardly, wondering why he was here.

"Rachel, sweetheart," Miss Cat said, "Show Puck to his room." She flashed him a smile before disappearing behind the doors. Rachel made her way over to Puck, who's expression didn't change.

"Hey, I'm Rachel," She said, giving a little smile. She didn't want to be overly bubbly and make him uncomfortable. He nodded,

"I got that, aren't you a little young to be here?"

"This is the teenage ward," She said, leading him down the hallways, "But I don't live here, I'm just a volunteer."

"So you want to study crazy people when you are older?" He said, "What a career. Put them under a microscope and watch them suffer in their insane little minds."

"This isn't my future career," She said, "I'm going to be on Broadway, I just need hours."

"So this is just something you do in your free time, a hobby?" He said. She just looked at him, before pushing the door open. He slowly entered and sat on the bed, Rachel went to the closet and pulled out some bed sheet. She started dressing the bed in silence while he watched.

"You could help you know," She said, throwing him a pillowcase. He wordlessly picked it up and started stuffing a pillow into it. He glanced at Rachel every so often, watching her curiously. She glanced up once, and caught him staring at her. She offered a smile before looking down but Puck could tell it didn't reach her eyes. Once she finished she smoothed out the sheets and then said,

"You have an appointment with Dr. Berry at 3pm. That's in about, five minutes." She said, "I'll get a nurse to show you were the office is."

"Can't you show me where the office is?" She pursed her lips together before sitting on the edge of the bed.

"I suppose I could, but I thought it would be good if you met some of the other employees too."

"What if I don't want to meet anyone else?" He asked.

"You're going to have too, you'll be here for awhile." She said. He just looked at her, and Rachel swears she saw something in the corner begging her to stay. She sat on the bed, on the edge and crossed her legs. Puck sat on the chair, face down and hands clasped together. He was staring down. Rachel took this time to study the new patient.

His forehead was creased, like he was thinking about something. He started blinking, to hold back the tears. He refused to cry on his first day, especially in front of a nurse who was only here for fun. Rachel continued to look at him, his jaw clenched suddenly, like he got angry about something he thought. He tightened his hands together, pressing them so that they almost turned red. Rachel saw his eye twitch as he slowly loosened his grip. He looked back up at her, his brown eyes boring into hers. There was layers and layers of emotions filling his eyes, but in a second they were gone once he realized who he was looking at.

"Ready to go?" She asked, getting up. He nodded, grateful that she didn't mention anything. She offered a small smile and lead him out of the room. They made they way back down the hallways and at every person Puck looked them up and down before staring at them. They shrunk away and he gave himself a little smirk.

"Just because you were the resident badass at McKinley, doesn't mean that you have to be that here."

"And why not? Isn't it good to uphold a title?"

"You are going to be living with these people, everyday for god knows how many years. You should try being nice."

"I will be going to school with my classmates for 'god knows how many years.'" He mocks.

"Do you live with them every second of the day? Spend free time, breakfast, lunch and dinner with them? I think not. But with these people, you will. So try making friends instead of scaring everyone away. Do you want to end up alone?"

"Not everyone can be little Miss Perky and happy all the time. Some of us have gone through stuff."

"Who's says I haven't?" She said, turning to the door and stopping. Puck raised his eyebrow and said,

"The fact that you are wearing volunteer clothes while I'm stuck in the uniform. You're on the other side of the fence, sweetie." He lightly pushed her out of his way and opened the door. Rachel huffed before closing the door, not before smiling at her Dad. He smiled back at her, as she closed the door and then turned to Puck. He didn't miss the interaction between those too. He awkwardly stood at the door.

"Please, sit." Dr. Berry said, "Make your self comfortable."

Puck looked around the room, it was a fairly light room with windows on one side. Dr. Berry was sitting in a large leather chair, he had a notepad on his lap with a pen attached to it. Dr. Berry observed Puck and Puck felt like a lab rat. He quickly made his way to the chair opposite the doctor and stretched out. He looked back, not breaking eye contact.

"So, Noah," He started.

"No," Puck said, "Don't call me Noah. There are only two people in this world that can call me that and you are not one of them. Puck or Puckerman." Dr. Berry bit his lip before nodding.

"I'm sorry," He said, "I'm going to take a note of that, do you mind?" Puck shrugged. "I'll be writing everything down, but if you prefer, I can always record it. I just like to go over the notes after the session, so I can find the best way to help you so you can get out of here and live in the real world."

"Writings fine." He mumbled. Dr. Berry nodded and said,

"So would you like to tell me why you're here?"

"Haven't you heard?" He said, raising his voice a little. Dr. Berry's eyebrows flew up and he said,

"I've heard variations of why you are here. But I would like to hear it from you, since you are the one experiencing it."

Puck took a deep breath, closed his eyes and said, "Can we not talk about that yet? Stick to whatever you've heard but I'd rather not talk about it." He gripped the edge of the chair, forming words in his head that he could scream if his request is denied.

Again, Dr. Berry nodded. He thought it would be best not to irritate the patient on the first day, later on he'd poke and prod, getting some reactions but for now, he'll tread lightly. He did feel bad though, especially for his younger patients, because they'd been through so much in such little time.

"So what would you like to talk about instead?" Puck didn't answer, instead he continued to look around the room. He stared at the pictures on the doctors desk. He saw one of him, hugging another man, kissing another man and one with him and said man holding a baby. There was also a picture of Rachel, she was grinning and holding up a plaque. It was too small for Puck to read, so he moved his eyes to the next picture. He saw one of Rachel, standing next to some light brown hair and blue eyed boy. He was wearing a tux, while Rachel was in a stunning pink dress. They were hugging and laughing, smiling straight at the camera.

"Is she your daughter?" Puck asked, unexpectedly. Dr. Berry raised his eyes, surprised at the comment and quickly composed himself. He nodded,

"Yes, Rachel is my daughter." He paused, "And no, she's not allowed to date patients." Puck shrugged and said,

"Wasn't planning on dating her."

"Never said you were," The doctor eyed him with curiousity, "It was just a statement."

"You were implying something, though," Puck raised his eyebrows and stretched out, "Everyone assumes I'm stupid, just because I'm a resident stud. Hell, maybe I am stupid, but I still pick up on things and I can pick up the fact that if Rachel brings me home for dinner to meet you two, you'll have a gun at my head. So I'll avoid that. Plus, she's not my type. I don't date girls who are looking for something more than just sex."

"So you aren't into commitments… that's interesting."

"You think a guy like me would be?" He gave a lifeless laugh, "Wow. Are you sure you're good at reading people?"

The doctor sighed, "Do you want to know what I've gathered from today's session, Puck? You don't like commitments, you have a tough exterior, you are very good at annoying people, and reputation is everything to you. That's what I know."

"Getting frustrated with me, now are you Doc?" He said sarcastically, "And you're wrong. I don't have a tough exterior, I am tough. There's nothing double sided to me, no person hiding inside. I am who I 'express' myself to be and that's it." He got up and stalked out of the room, "Until next week." He waved. He threw open the door and tried to remember where his room was, but he got lost. He sighed and went to the desk that was there. The nurse helpfully gave him directions to his room, but before he left, he asked to make a call. She smiled and led him to a room, which was totally private. She said she would come back in half an hour, but Puck assured her it wouldn't take that long. She left and he went to the phone. He picked it up and dialed an all to familiar number.

"Sam?" He whispered.

"Puck?" Sam asked confused, "Where are you calling from? Dude why weren't you at school?" Then he paused, "Are you okay? Santana's been acting weird all day and refused to tell anyone what happened."

"I… I tried to kill myself."

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**Any thoughts? :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for all the reviews and alerts I got for the first chapter! I honestly didn't think that people would like it so much and I'm extremely pleased!**

**I will try to update every day or every other day, but I'm sorry if I miss a few... exams are coming up!**

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**Chapter 2**

"What…" Sam said, shocked, "Puck…"

"Santana found me, in a pool of my own blood." He let out a lifeless chuckled; "She took me to the hospital where they fixed me, unfortunately and then they checked me into here. I… um… can you bring me my work? I should finish that." He was feeling weird, like the words that were coming out of his mouth wasn't what he wanted to say. He didn't know how to say what he wanted to. He heard Sam gulp and say,

"Of course, Puck. I'll be happy to bring you the work. Don't worry, I won't tell anyone except Santana that I know."

"Thanks man. I should go now…" He said, feigning a yawn, "I'm tired. Night."

"See you soon," Sam whispered before hanging up. Puck put the phone down and stared at it for a while. The nurse came back in and looked at him, before gently nudging him to get up.

"Did you call your family?" Puck winced before saying,

"Yeah. Yeah I did."

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Puck got back to his room and he glanced at the alarm clock. It said, 11:54pm. He sighed before sitting on his bed. He threw off the covers and pillows before lying on the bare bed. He could smell a faint bit of Rachel's perfume, it smelt like flowers. He closed his eyes and breathes in her scent, trying to fall asleep but with no luck. So instead he just stared at the ceiling, trying to void his mind of all thoughts.

Rachel was packing up her stuff, when he Dad came wondering down the hallway.

"Leaving so late?" He asked, she nodded.

"I didn't think you would be so late. But I finished my work anyways." She lied.

He nodded and they started down the hallway. When they pasted Puck's room, Rachel looked in, but the room was dark. She blinked before continuing down the hallway.

"He's a interesting character…" Her father said, "But he's going to be hard to crack." He stopped a few feet away from the door and said, "It's going to be rough."

"Who says he needs to be cracked? Maybe he's naturally, a hard headed person." She said. He looked at her and said,

"No ones born like that. There's something else behind that hard exterior. I know there is."

"But…" Rachel said, "If he's learnt that he should have a hard exterior and shut out the world, prying and trying to crack him within the first few days of him coming here isn't going to go well. If you really think you're right, you should give him a few weeks. Let him settle down before digging up everything in his past." She heard something behind her and whipped around. She saw a body quickly move but by the colour of the skin, she knew it was Puck because it was a lot darker than the residents here. She was sure that he was naturally that colour, but after a few weeks in here, without being outside, people turn pale.

She gave herself a little smile before her Dad turned to her and started walking again. "I think maybe you shouldn't be so involved with the patients."

"Why because you don't like me forming my own opinions?" She said as she walked down the staircase quickly. Her father sighed and said,

"No, just that I don't want you falling behind with school. How's Jesse doing?" He asked about her boyfriend, which made Rachel cringed. She quickly changed her expression and said,

"I'm not falling behind and Jesse and I are fine. In fact, we are going to Prom together."

"Isn't Prom in your senior year?" He asked, confused. He clicked the button and the car opened. She pulled open the door and got in. She threw her bag to the back and slipped her phone in her pocket and said,

"He's a senior dad. We've gone over this."

"Oh right," He said, yawning before rubbing his eyes, "Let's see if I can get us home, alive now?"

She gave him a little smile before glancing at her phone. She had twelve miss calls and fourteen texts from Quinn. She slid her phone and checked the messages.

**Help. Currently failing English. – Q **

**Are you still up? – R **

**Of course. – Q **

**I'll be over in a few minutes. – R **

**You better. – Q**

"Dad… can I go to Quinn's? She needs me. Moral support, boyfriend troubles." She skillfully lied. There was one thing her Dad's never questioned and that was when she needed to see a friend about 'boyfriend troubles'. It was one of those, don't ask don't tell kind of topics and Rachel was so grateful that it was her scapegoat.

When she got to Quinn's house, she collapsed onto the bed. Quinn sighed and said,

"I'm not getting my English done tonight, am I?"

"No," Rachel grumbled, "I'm tired and hungry. And I needed to get out of that car and enter somewhere that's NOT my house."

"Troubles in Berry Land?" Quinn asked, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"I think so…" Rachel sighed, "Just stuff is kind of piling up and with the hours I put into the hospital, I'm not sure I can mange."

"You're a terrible liar," She said, "What's going on?"

"Nothing… I'm just a little troubled about something…"

"Would you care to elaborate?"

"No. I'd rather burry my head into these pillows until you brought me toast with nutella?" she said, hopefully. Quinn sighed and made her way downstairs. That was something Rachel loved about Quinn, she didn't push unless there was a reason. And Quinn didn't have a reason… at the moment.

Rachel propped herself up on the pillows, thinking about the conversation she had with her Dad about Puck. She truly believed that pushing him, the way her Dad does, will just make his situation worse. She wasn't exactly sure what it was, just that he'd tried to kill himself and his friend found him. She knew he was tough, something must've happened and he's not about to open up anytime soon. Pretending to be tough all the time must've made him believe he truly was tough. He forgot who he was and he's still trying to figure it out. Rachel sighed again, she could relate. Her fathers pushed music and Broadway on her so much, she forgot her true passion in life. And it's a little too late to be figuring that all out now.

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Quinn brought up the toast, and they shared a plate. They both made idle chitchat before they called it lights out and slept. But Rachel couldn't get Puck out of her mind.

Puck was grateful for what Rachel said. Maybe the doc would easy up on him a little bit. He would share…eventually if it came to that. But he's trying to put the past where it belongs, in the past, rather than bring up it. He didn't want to visit the skeletons in his attic anymore than he wanted global warming to be real. He just wanted to get through this hospital and get discharged soon. But he knew with the 'seriousness' of his case, it would be a good two years at best.

He lay down on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He hated this feeling, the feeling that sleep was avoiding him on purpose so that he'd have to think about thoughts he'd forget in the day. That why he always hated the night, it revealed to him the things he'd rather keep hidden.

He tried counting sheep, he tried reading a book (trust me, that was hard for him) but his eyes refused to shut and he longed for darkness to over take him. He wished he had his iPod with him, play himself a lullaby (Don't you dare tell anyone he said that) so that he could fall asleep, or play a game. Watch a movie or a show, do something. But instead, he was left pacing up and down his room, until the early hours of the morning when finally, finally sleep decided to pity the poor boy and come to his aid.

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	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**Here is Chapter 3! I hope you guys like it! :) Sorry for the delay, I've been incredibly busy. A little heads up, I won't be posting for a few days, because I'm going on a school trip and won't be able to post anything, or possibly write a chapter. :(**

**I own: The story plot. Nothing more, nothing less. **

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Rachel decided to skip school and go back to the hospital. She felt like she should put in a few more hours. Her Dad had the day off so she didn't have to duck behind desks. Everyone in the hospital knew how much she liked being there so they never ratted her out to her Dad.

She walked down the hallway with pillows so that she could replace Puck's. Apparently last night, he ripped them up out of frustration. Well, that's what the nurses said. Rachel had a feeling that something else was wrong. She politely knocked on the door and she heard a grunt. She took it as a 'yes' and walked into the room.

There were feathers all over the room and Puck was sitting in the middle. He didn't look up or say anything. He just sat there, fiddling with a feather in his fingers.

"Sorry…" He said, he didn't sound sorry, just dull. Then he looked up at Rachel. She saw tears in his eyes and emotions flowing out of them. She placed the pillows on the bed, carefully. Then she walked over and sat beside him. She didn't say anything as she carefully placed her self so that she was lightly leaning on him. He was rigid for a second before relaxing and letting her place her weight on him.

He liked how light she was, she reminded him of his sister, how she used to sit in his arms. He wanted to wrap his arms around her, but wasn't sure how'd she react. He was pretty sure that she was just being nice because he was hurt and stuck in this place. Her pager vibrated and they both jumped. She checked it and said,

"You have two visitors coming up. Let's get this room in shape shall we?" Rachel said, she gave him his hand and he took it. They both stood up and he said,

"Don't tell your Dad, please?" He shook his head, "I just don't want… I'm not someone you can crack. I'm just…"

"I won't tell," She said, picking up the feathers and placing them in the garbage bin. He handed her a bunch and she threw them out. The continued in silence for a few minutes before they were done.

"Do you know who's coming up?" Puck asked her. She shook her head no and fluffed the new pillows before setting them on the bed.

"So you have a maid? Fancy place…" A Latina girl sauntered in and said. She had a small smile on her face but her eyes were stone cold. There was another person with her. He had shaggy blond hair and goofy smile on his face. But again, he's eyes were serious.

"Definitely is," Rachel said, "But please don't move in." She gave them a small smile before leaving. They both smiled at her as she left and once she was gone, Sam said,

"So no one at school knows. They think you're off at Juvi, again." Puck gave a little snort and said,

"I guess it's better than being here." He lay down on his bed, looking at the ceiling. Santana stood there, lips pursed and hands on her hips.

"Everyone's worried though, in Glee club. Mercedes wanted to come down to Juvi and visit you but we convinced them that is was the last place you'd want them to be. Even Brit knows I'm lying," She paused, "She keeps asking, I don't know what to say anymore."

"Just tell her the truth, she won't say anything if you tell her not too." Puck shrugged, he was beyond caring at this point. "Does everyone know about…"

"That's the second reason why they are all so worried. When you get out of here, you'll be bombarded with questions and flowers and everyone saying, 'Are you okay.' And I can't tell Brit, she won't understand."

"Just say, 'I found Puckerman lying in a pool of his own blood after he's Mom and sister died.' Yeah, she'll freak out and not speak for weeks. She'll have nightmares and go crazy. You know how sad she was when she found out about Eden and Margret. She went berserk. It took her a week before she started talking and didn't act like a zombie."

Puck shrugged, "Then you have to keep lying to her. You can't pin this on me, it's not my fault she won't understand or you don't want to deal with the consequences."

"YOU." She jabbed her finger at Puck, "Didn't have to slice your wrists off. You were upset, angry, confused. So many emotions and we all know you don't deal well with that but you didn't have to do that. You could've talked to us, we were there for you. Standing, literally, next to you."

Puck jumped up fuming, "If you didn't find me, none of this would be happening. I would be with my sister and my mother, you'd be cuddling with Brittany without a second thought and trouty mouth would be singing songs to the blond that goes to Crawford day without even a second glance at my casket. This is your fault for finding me."

"Puck…" Sam said, "None of that would be happening."

Puck flopped back on the bed, the room was filled with sparks and they were soon going to go off, one by one, unless they left. Puck flicked his head to the door, motioning them to leave. Santana closed her eyes and sighed and Sam gave a little wave.

They walked out of the room and Sam shook his head.

"Well that went well…" Santana just shook her head before walking over to where Rachel was standing, behind the desk. She looked up and offered the two irritated visitors a smile. Santana pulled out a piece of paper with two numbers written onto it.

"This is mine and Sam's number. Keep it, we'd like a progress report every week since I don't think we'll be allowed to come back."

Rachel took the slip of paper and clipped it to Puck's file.

"You should come back, though," She said, "Maybe not tomorrow or something but in a few weeks. Just give him a little time, it's always hard."

"It wouldn't be if he would just talk." Santana said, "I get it, I'm not the most talkative person out there but when I needed help I talked to some people and worked through my stuff."

"Some people don't want to talk, they just want to figure it out themselves. It takes time but eventually he'll come around, he has too."

"You have a doctor on call, right?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Rachel said, "Nurses and Doctors are always here. There also a physiatrist. But since it's Friday, it's the 'lazy' day. They can sleep all day if they want to, don't have to talk to anyone. But from Saturday-Thursday then have to go see the physiatrist for half an hour."

"And how did yesterdays session go?" Santana asked.

"I can't give out any information, I'm sorry," Rachel did actually sound regretful, "But, between you and me, I don't think it went very well. It's always hard, the first few couple of days but Puck should ease into it. People are friendly and no matter how rude you are to them, they'll always be friendly." They both nodded and said,

"Thank you. Please, do call with progress, when you can." Rachel nodded and gave them another smile before they headed to the elevator. Sam glanced back at Puck's room once more before leaving, looking regretful, like there was something that he should've said but didn't. Santana didn't look back once.

Rachel knew something had happened and decided she would go back and give him some company. 'It must get lonely,' she thought, 'When you chase off your friends within a few seconds of seeing them.'

"Hi," She said, she saw him sitting on the bed, staring into nothing again. 'It must be a habit,' she thought. He looked up and smiled, but it was an empty, like a ghost. She sat on the edge of the bed, on the other side.

"So, I don't really know what to do… I've never had a patient that's so eerily quiet. So I'm going to fill this silence with words? I hope you don't mind… say nothing if you do, make a noise if you don't." He grunted meaning that he didn't mind. She smiled and said, "Well, I'm going to tell you a few things about me, since soon, since I'm a nurse/volunteer, I'll find out things about you too. I'm a singer, my parents don't think it'll go anywhere, but I'm hopefully. Always will be. I think I'll light up the Broadway stage with my voice and dances and with my glow-yness…" She rambled on, "With my happy demeanor and my positive outlook on life."

"No one could ever be happy forever, eventually something bad will happen and it'll bring your sparkly world to a halt. Then what will you do?" Puck said, finally.

"I'll look at the bright side…" Rachel said, surprised that he had said anything at all.

"But what if there isn't anything good? What if it's all negative?"

"Like what…" She said, "Give me an example."

"Never mind," He said, lying on his back, face up to the ceiling, "Forget I ever said anything."

"Puck…" She said, and then sighed. She wanted to say something, but he almost shared something so she didn't say anything more.

"Just say it," He said, "I'm tired of everyone walking on egg shells around me, might as well say what you want to say."

"Is that what Santana did?" She asked, "She doesn't seem like one to hold anything back. You threw them out of your life, I'm not going to let you do that to me too." Then she got up and started walking out the door, just as Puck said,

"Death of a family member, where's the good in that?"

Rachel turned around, mouth slightly open and said, "They're in a better place. Somewhere where they can't be hurt again." Then she flicked the lights off and closed the door, letting Puck wonder if she was right, or just trying to prove a point.

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**So, did you guys like it? Please review. Reviews make my day! I'm not kidding :) Thank You!**


	4. Chapter 4

**I own: The story plot**

**Thank you for all the support everyones giving the story. :)**

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Chapter 4

Puck walked into Dr. Berry's office and sat on the chair. He stared at Mr. Berry, who was taking notes, on what, Puck didn't have a clue. He slouched on the chair and continued to stare. After a while, Puck cleared his throat and Mr. Berry looked up, startled to see him there.

"Oh, we had an appointment today? I completely forgot. I didn't even here you come into the room," He gave a little laugh, "I'm extremely busy and tired, please, excuse my behaviour."

"Busy and tired? Why, problems in the Barry household?" Puck said, leaning towards the doctor ever so slightly. Dr. Berry couldn't help but notice how interested Puck was in his home life, but he decided to not make assumption out loud.

"No, no, not at all," He said, "Everything's fine at home, Rachel's doing better than ever and my husband," He paused waiting for a reaction from Puck but he continued to stare at him, "Is great." He licked his lips before saying, "Can I ask you something?"

"Go for it, doc," Puck said, leaning back into his chair, looking bored again. "Ask away."

"You didn't seem surprised when I said, 'husband,' nor did you have an opinion about it. Why?"

"Because you having a husband doesn't bother me. I got it from all the pictures on your desk with him and Rachel as well, I have friends who are gay. I don't care if you are gay, straight or whatever. Doesn't bother me. In fact, anything happens to Kurt, I'll beat the shit out of them. I did, when Karofsky did it. Sent him packing." He grinned, satisfied.

Dr. Berry quickly wrote all this down and then said, "You were happy you beat this, Karofsky boy up?"

"Yeah," Puck said, flexing his arms, "Of course, he was throwing my boy Kurt into lockers and tormenting him all day and all night. I want him to feel some pain, some humility. Feel something since obviously throwing a poor, harmless boy into a locker, tormenting and hurting him every day just because he loves another dude." Puck's fisted clutched together and he was getting angrier and angrier just thinking about it, and saying it. He was thinking about what was happening now, since he wasn't there. He was hoping Santana would keep Kurt and Blaine safe, she probably was, but still. He still worried over them, he never wanted anyone to feel the way he saw Kurt feel. It was just wrong, so wrong. And most of all, he didn't want any of them to end up where he was.

"So this boy, Kurt, is a friend of yours?"

"Yeah," Puck said, settling himself down, "He is. He came to me when this got out of control so I tried talking to Karofsky but he wouldn't listen. So I decided to do something that would get through to him. Violence worked well and I did get suspended but it was totally worth it."

"Are you normally a violent guy?" He asked, jotting everything down.

"No," he said, reluctantly, "I don't like being violent with people but it's the only thing that seem to get through to people these days."

"But you are the resident badass," Dr. Berry said, "Doesn't that mean, 'pow-pow'?"

"That just means people fear me, my word is the law. It's always been like that and always will be."

"So in your future, you'll be a boss of a large company or the mafia?" He chuckled at his little joke. Puck glared at him and said,

"That's what I want. The big company and everything," He laid back, "Yeah, I can boss people around and no one can say anything. But, um, Doc," He said, "Do I even have a future? I might never get out of here and if I do I'll be the oldest in all my university classes, that is if I finish high school and right now I'm so close to the end…"

"Well…" The doctor sighed, "We can see if some of your friends will bring you the work. We have notified your teachers, only the ones in the courses you are taking. I'm sure they wouldn't mind sending the homework to you, we always can get you a tutor if you need one. If you are stable enough, you could go to school to take the exams. If not you'll take them right here."

Puck was silent for a second and then said, "Okay. Cool. I'll go call some people. Thanks for the session, doc." He got up and was about to leave when Dr. Berry said,

"Wait, we haven't finished yet. We still have other things to discuss."

"Like?" Puck said, meandering back to the chair and sitting down.

"Like…" Dr. Berry fiddled for a second to find the words, "Since you heard about my family earlier, can you tell me a little bit about yours?"

"I had a mother and a sister. That's my family." He said, coldly.

"No Dad?" He asked, curious.

"There was one, he stayed for only one night before he left my mom. My sister is technically my step-sister but I consider her my REAL sister. Her died when I was eight and she was four. So technically we have no dad," He said, curly. He kept his eyes cold, warning the doctor that he was on very dangerous ground. But Dr. Berry didn't really care, at least he was making progress.

"Can you tell me about them? More about your sister and mother?"

"Like what else do you need to know?" He asked, not wanting to say anything.

"What were they like?"

"Good session doc," Puck repeated from earlier, "I'll call those people." This time he was quicker and walked out before Dr. Berry could say anything else.

He ran down to his room and glugged down some water. His throat felt hollow and he closed his eyes to stop the tears that were forming. He didn't want to cry, not now. He lay down on his bed, voiding his mind of his family but as always his brain refused to let him. So he grabbed a pillow instead and screamed into it. Immediately, Rachel came running into the room.

"Is everything okay, Noah?" She asked, worriedly. Her eyes went wide and she clamped her hand over her mouth. She hadn't meant to say Noah, she had been reading his file and knew he didn't allow anyone to call him that. But in the file everyone wrote Noah instead of Puck. He removed the pillow from his face and glared at her.

"What did you just say?"

"I…I asked if you were aright?" She tried to skirt the question by avoiding the name she called him.

"What else?" He demanded.

"No nothing. I don't remember saying anything else." She said taking a step back.

"Did you say Noah?"

"I didn't mean to, I swear. I'm so sorry Puck. It won't happen again."

"It better not," He growled, eyes on fire. Rachel gulped and took a step back, not liking the look she saw in his eyes. It scared her but she refused to show she was scared. She nodded quickly and ran out. She ran down the hallway and almost bumped into her Dad. He looked at her, concerned but she just brushed off his standard questions and smiled at him.

She went to behind the nurses' station to clean up the paperwork she had left lying about. Luckily, no one had appeared to be there, so everything was as she left it. She unclipped the paper with Santana's and Sam's number. She took out her phone and started to dial the number but then stopped. She could take care of this herself, she didn't need anyone else. She put the paper back into the file and tucked it away. She went to the chair and sat down. She decided to waft through some other files.

Her Dad came over to her desk asking if she wanted to go home soon. She nodded and smiled. She was getting her coat when Puck walked up to her, she bit her lip and took a slight step back, scare of what awaited her.

"Um," He said, stopping in front of her and he looked down, "I just wanted to say sorry for what happened earlier. Do… do you think that you and I could sit down for coffee one day…"

Rachel smiled and she wished he had been looking up so he could see the smile on her face, "Sure. I'll be back on Monday, can we do it then?"

"What about tomorrow? Why won't you be here tomorrow?" He sounded a little anxious but quickly coughed to cover it up. He glanced up at her and she said,

"Because it's the weekend silly, I have the two days off. There'll be other people on shift, so you don't have to worry." She light touched his arm, before dropping her hand. He gave a little smile before saying,

"I'm not worrying, not at all," He said, oozing back into himself again, "I'll see you Monday then." He gave a little nod. She smiled before putting on her coat and walking towards where her Dad was standing.

"What was that about?"

"Oh no nothing," She said, "Just saying bye and whatnot."

"Hmm…" He said before opening the door and smiling, "Of course."

"Dad, I have a boyfriend!"

"You don't have to keep reminding me," He said, grouchily, "And I still don't like that Jesse kid."

"You won't approve of anyone," She said, making her way down the stairs, "So I had to make the decision myself."

"You would've anyways," He said, "That's the way you are."

"That's the way YOU raised me." She sing-songed.

Puck sauntered back to his room, unsure of how he felt at the moment. He was mad at himself for snapping at Rachel, she had been so kind to him, even though he hadn't been acting exactly, well lately. But who could blame him, he was three days into a life long process. He wasn't sure if he'd be able to handle it, but there wasn't a way out. He'd tried opening the windows but none of them budged. He tried finding something sharp, but clearly they had thought this through because there was nothing sharp in site. Nothing.

He lay down on his bed trying to think of something he could do in the meantime, but came up with nothing. He heard Rachel's voice in his head saying that he should go make friends. He wondered out to the common place, where he saw a few boys around his age sitting. He saw one in the corner, reading a book. He didn't seem interested in the book, he was looking in front of him.

He walked up to him and sat down beside him.

"What are you reading?" Puck asked awkwardly.

"A book," He replied back, closing it, "I'm not sure, I wasn't really reading it."

"I could tell," He said, "That's why sat beside you." The other boy laughed and said,

"I'm Alec."

"Puck or Puckerman, which ever you prefer."

"How nice to give me an option. I'll stick with Puck though, Puckerman sounds… a little to long."

"Whatever you said, Alex."

"AlEC. With a C, not an X."

"Unique." Alec laughed, "Yeah, my mother always tried to be."

"Alec!" One of the nurses called, "Ashley and Seth are here for you!" Just then a little brunette child, no older than 10 ran into the room and jumped into Alec's arms.

"ALEC! ALEC!" She squealed, "When are you coming home?"

He glanced sadly at Puck but then reanimated his face for the little girl, "Soon, Ash, soon I'll be home."

A tall, lean blond came into view, casually strolling down. He waved hello at a few people before stopping in front of Alec and Ashley. He picked her up and carried her, Alec followed wordlessly, just shrugging to Puck. Puck waved before leaning against the wall. He picked up the book Alec dropped and looked at the page.

_Something wicked this way comes._

* * *

__**Reviews, anyone? :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

**I hope you guys like it! I'm sorry for the long wait, I feel bad but I'm buried under work at school right now! :(**

**I only own the story plot and Alec. That's it. **

* * *

The weekend went slow compared to the three days that Puck was with Rachel. He continued to lie on the bed and talked to Alec. Alec seemed like a cool guy, he told Puck about his sister and bother that had come earlier to visit him.

"Seth was updating me on his dating problems," He rolled his eyes as he slumped against the wall, Monday morning, "Honestly, sometimes I want to tell him to shut up but whatever."

"Dating problems?" Puck laughed, "Oh man, at least you have visitors."

"Did you scare of that super hot girl that came to visit you the other day? I had my eye on her but she left in a rush and in a bad mood too…"

Puck laughed even louder, "You don't want to get involved with that one,"

"Why not? If she can be tamed, I'm sure she'd be pretty fun."

"If the resident badass couldn't tame her, what makes you think that a scrawny boy like you could?"

Alec puffed out his chest and said, "I am not scrawny! I am as fit as a fiddle!"

"According to who?" Rachel walked into the room smiling, "I don't think you've worked out a day in your life."

"I was buff before I came here," Alec said very seriously, "I'm not kidding, I'll get Seth to bring some photo's next time he's here. You missed them, they came yesterday."

Rachel sighed with sadness, "Aw, I missed Ash! How is she by the way?"

"She's doing well, still wondering when I'll get out of here…" he said sadly.

Rachel looked down at the floor before looking up at Puck, "Ready to go?" He nodded, "So are we just going to the cafeteria?"

"No, I got you special permission. We are going to the cafeteria in the hospital, not the one in the ward." She smiled, "But we only have an hour, so let's go." She smiled at him as they walked towards the elevator, "So I see you've made a friend."

"I have," He said, "Are you proud of me?"

"Very proud," Rachel said, getting into the elevator. Puck smiled as he got in.

"I must say, the weekend was quiet uneventful without you parading around, I had to find my source of entertainment somewhere else." She laughed,

"Is that you think I do? Parade around?" Puck nodded and she laughed, "Well… I will give you credit though, Alec is very amusing. Sad he's in here."

"Why is he here anyways?" He asked the doors opened and stepped out. Rachel steered him towards the Starbucks before answering,

"I don't think it's really fair that I'm telling you. Ask him yourself, I'm sure he'll tell you, though." She said as they lined up.

"So you mean, no one except the nurses and your dad knows why I'm here?"

"Actually, the only one who knows really why your head is the head of the ward, we know bits and pieces of what happened but no one knows what. My dad likes the patient to tell him themselves rather then already knowing and listening to the story again." She shrugged. They ordered the coffee and Rachel paid. Puck felt bad not being able to pay so as they sat down he said,

"When I'm out of here, I'll pay you back for the coffee."

"Puck, it's okay," She said, "It's not that much." She rested her hand lightly on his for a second before pulling away.

"Um," He said, biting his lip, "So back to what we were talking about before, no one knows… hm." Rachel nodded and smiled again.

"I'm sorry about the other day," She said suddenly, "About calling you by your first name."

"It's okay, I shouldn't have snapped at you. Truth is… it caught me by surprise and…" He sighed, "It brought up a much of memories for me and I wasn't ready for them."

"Do mind me asking, why you won't let anyone call you by your first name? You don't have to answer."

"How about this?" Puck said, "You ask a question, I'll ask a question. Full truth nothing more, nothing less."

"Done," They clinked their coffee cups together and Puck took a deep breath before saying, "I don't let anyone called me that because my Mom and my sister used to call me that. They were the only ones allowed to call me that."

"Why th-"

"Na, na, na." He said, waving his finger in the air, "My turn." Rachel pouted and Puck almost gave in before he said, "So are you single?"

"No, I have a boyfriend. His name is Jesse and he's a singer." He nodded, pursing his lips together, 'I bet I'd be better boyfriend than Jesse.' He thought before shaking his head.

"Why were they the only ones allowed to call you by your first name?"

"Because… I was, am…" he quickly corrected himself, "Am the badass. Noah isn't a badass name, but Puck is. So I got everyone else to call me Puck because my sister and mother refused too." He paused, "My turn. What school do you go to?"

"Crawford Country Day." She said, "Do you play any instruments?"

"Guitar, I miss playing that. Hell, I used to have a necklace with a guitar pick on it, they took it away from me when I got to the hospital." He smiled ruefully, "What's your favourite colour?"

"Pink. Who came to visit you the other day?" She tried to sound nonchalantly but Puck heard the slight envy in her voice, envy of Santana.

He gave a little chuckle before saying, "That was Santana and Sam. Two of my best friends. Santana was actually the one who…" He broke off for a second staring at the table, his throat clogged so he coughed to clear it, "Um, okay my question. How long have you been with Jesse?"

Rachel bit her lip and said, "One year," She paused and said, "What's your favourite subject in school?" She tried to change the emotions in the air.

"Don't…" He said, "Don't try to change it. Ask the question you really want to ask, don't ask the question to the change the subject. Just ask the question your heart truly desires."

"What is your favourite subject?" She said again.

"Just. Ask. The. Question." He said, calmly. He looked into her eyes and stared, "Rachel, ask it."

She continued to stare into Puck's eyes, trying to figure out what game Puck was playing. But his eyes gave away nothing except for a stone cold expression. He continued to stare at without blinking. She felt slight fear but she also felt slight intrigue and curiosity. Finally she said,

"Santana found you… what?"

"In a pool of my own blood," He said back casually.

"Why were you in a blood of your own blood?"

"Because I tried to kill myself," He was very calm and she continued with her questions,

"Why did you try to kill yourself?"

"Because my mother and my sister died, I couldn't deal with it and I fell into a depression. I couldn't take it after a few days and decided that I'd join them. Santana found me and brought me here."

"How did they die?"

"Car crash," He said, "It was brutal. A drunk driver. My fathers out of the picture and I had to organize everything myself. Everyone kept asking me how I was and I couldn't take it anymore. I lost it and just decided to end it."

Her breath caught in her throat and they just stared at each other for a while. Rachel hadn't expected to get the full story or any story at all. He continued to stare back at her, he felt like he wanted to cry but looking at Rachel's strong face, he couldn't. There was a definite connection between them. He felt slightly stronger and he said,

"That was more than one question." He breaking his gaze from her face and looking across the cafeteria.

"Fine," Rachel said after a pause, "You can ask me more than one."

"Are things serious with this Jesse, kid?"

"Yes, we are going to move to New York together and perform on Broadway."

"Is he the same age as you?"

"No, senior this year."

"So he's going to New York before you."

"Yes but we are going to keep a long distance relationship."

Puck snorted, "Like that will work. The point of a high school relationship is that its supposed to be all about lust and craziness. Not about settling down and getting married."

"We aren't getting married," Rachel huffed.

"Wait for it, he'll propose soon enough. And if that doesn't happen then he'll probably hook up with some chick in New York."

"Jesse wouldn't think about doing that."

"Have you guys even done anything yet?"

"Yes," She said, sulking, "We have."

"Like not like kiss or nicely make out. I mean like, sex and stuff like that."

"No we haven't." Puck slammed the table with his drink, causing it to shake. Rachel flinched.

"He's definitely going to tap something else while your suck in school here."

"No he won't!" She said, kind of loudly. "He'd never cheat on me, he promised."

Puck rolled his eyes and said, "Are you inside his brain? NO. I would know, I'm a teenage boy."

"Yeah, well, Jesse isn't like you. He's going…" Rachel stopped her sentence not liking where it was going.

"Keep going with that sentence." He said, the cold expression back into his eyes, "Say what you were thinking, I can take it."

"No you can't you are living in a metal hospital. I can't say things like that."

"OH FOR GODS SAKE!" He slammed the table again, "Just. SAY IT. DO IT RACHEL. SAY IT." He continued to stare at her and she cringed back. "DO IT. SAY IT RACHEL. JUST SAY IT."

"He's going somewhere. He's going to collage. He's going to have a life. We are going to get out of here." She said back coldly, "Is that what you wanted to hear? Is it?"

"That's exactly what I wanted to hear. Speak your mind around me," He said, coldly, "Don't be afraid to speak your mind. I'm not going off the tracks again, I'm going to make a good recovery and get back out of here and out of your hair and life as soon as possible." He got up and said curtly, "Thank you for the coffee. I'll see you back upstairs." He sped walked to the elevator and pressed the button quickly. It opened and he got in, pressing the button for the ward.

He bit his lip from stopping the tears that was coming into his eyes, "I will not cry. I will not cry. I will not cry." He chanted over and over again in his head. He got up and went straight into his room, passing Alec on the way. He looked concerned at him but Puck slammed the door shut.

He drove under the covers and crying, "I have no future," He thought, "Why couldn't Santana just let me die?"

* * *

Rachel got up slowly, regretting what she had said. She knew he wasn't stronger enough to hear what she had said. She shouldn't have said it. She mentally slapped herself in the brain before throwing away her cup. She felt so awful about it, but Puck made her say it, so technically it was his fault… right?

She went to the elevator and pressed the button for the ward. She got out on the floor and went behind the counter. She found the bag that had 'Puck' written on it. She opened it and took out the necklace that had two guitar picks on it, one said Eden and the other said Sarah. She clutched it in her fist and put the bag away. She ripped out a piece of paper and wrote on it.

_You can wear it as long as you don't try any tricks. Keep it under your shirt and don't tell anyone so that they wont take it away. I trust you, Puck. _

She placed it into an envelop and walked to his room. She heard sobbing so she knocked on the door lightly.

"Go away!" Was heard so she bent down and slipped the envelop inside, hoping that he'd see it. She pressed her cheek against the door and said softly,

"I'm sorry."

* * *

**So what did you think? Do you like it or did you hate it? Please review! They mean the world to me! :)**


	6. PLEASE READ! IMPORTANT!

PLEASE READ:

GUYS! PLEASE SIGN THIS SIGN THIS PETITION! ITS TO STOP FANFICTION FROM TAKING DOWN ALL THE M-RATED/SMUT/SONG INSPIRED STORIES!

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	7. I'm Back!

Hey guys,

Okay I know this is a little confusing... me starting and stopping but I've decided to resume this story. It was a great idea and I just got bogged down with work and stress but I have some ideas for where this plot was going.

I'm so sorry for not updating and then quitting it but now I'll try my very hardest to have regular (or somewhat regular) updates!

Yay! So I'm back!

From,

R5 Fanatic


	8. Chapter 6

**Here is long awaited chapter 6! I hope you guys enjoy it! I wasn't too sure about this chapter but decided to post it anyways because sometimes I'm just worried for no reason. And I hope this is one of those times!**

**I own: The story plot, Seth, Alec and Ashley also Mary. **

**I don't own: Any of the Glee characters.**

**This is not beta'd so all the mistakes are mine. **

* * *

Chapter 6

Puck woke up to the site of his room all torn and tattered again. He sighed before picking up the remains of his pillow covers and the feathers that covered the floor. He started throwing everything in the garbage when he picked up an envelope. He opened it and saw the note Rachel left him. He fiddled with the necklace; in between his fingers while read the note. He slipped the necklace on and went to go find Rachel.

He walked out of the room and down the hallway where he saw her talking to her Dad in hushed tones. He walked closer when Dr. Berry spotted him and stopped talking he walked away from Rachel. She sighed before turning around and spotting Puck. She stared at him for a second,

"Hi," She said, "How are you feeling?" She started a brisk walk and he said,

"I'm sorry for what happened yesterday," He started as he caught up to her, "Look, I just want people to speak their mind around me. I don't want people to walk on eggshells around me. They did that when my mom and sister died and I hated it. Nothing went back to normal, I want things to go back to normal."

"You're in a totally different environment, nothings going to be normal."

"I know, but is it so bad that I want it to be?"

"No," She said, stopping, "It's not bad. But you just can't… anyways, don't expect people to be normal around you. Um, Santana and Sam have come to visit you again. They're in the visiting room."

She led him to the room in silence where Santana and Sam sat. They were talking in hushed tones and they looked up when Puck entered the room. He sat down at the desk across from them; Rachel smiled at them before saying,

"I'll be back in fifteen minutes," Then she left.

Santana turned to Puck and said, "How are you doing? Is everything okay?"

"Ya, everything's fine." He replied.

"Puck, talk to us man, what's been going on, made any friends?" Sam asked.

"Yeah I have a friend," He said, "Alec, maybe I'll introduce you."

"And you apparently have a friendship with Rachel, huh?" Santana said, "Dr. Berry told us, he said that you and Rachel went for coffee the other day."

"Yeah, yesterday," He said.

"What did you guys talk about?"

"Why do you care? We just had a little conversation,"

"IS that why your room is all torn up?" Santana shot back.

"Who told you that?"

"No one needs to, there are feathers on your shoulders." Sam said, "Puck, dude, what's happening? Why don't you talk to Dr. Berry, he says he's made no progress with you. You won't get better if you don't—"

"Stop." He said, growling at Sam, "I know how I can get better, if you two stop telling me what to do. I'm not going to get better over night these things take time. So stop pushing me around and let me make progress myself." He got up from the chair and left the room before saying, "I think you can show yourselves out."

He passed Rachel who looked up, hoping to say something to him but she didn't. Instead, she put her head back down and continued with her work. Puck noticed the movement but he didn't bother to stop by her desk either, he continued to walk down the hallway and into his room again.

His room was still a mess, so he tried to pile all the tatters of the pillows and the feathers into a pile and in one corner of the room. He realized he doesn't have any more pillows so he stepped out of the room and went to the desk.

"Hi," He said, the nurse looked up, "Um, I don't have an pillows anymore. Is there anyway I could get more?"

"Oh, of course," She said, "Rachel!" She called, "Puck needs more pillows." Rachel ran out of the office and went to the cupboard. She grabbed a few pillows and ran into Puck's room, not realizing he was right in front of her. She entered the empty room, eyebrows creased. She turned around to come face to face with Puck.

"Oh!" she said, her heart skipping a beat, "There you are. Well, here you go." She shoved the pillows into his hands but before she could leave he grabbed her hand and said,

"Wait," She spun around and faced him.

"Look Rachel," He said taking a deep breath "Is it weird that I'd rather talk to you, than to your dad or my friends?"

Rachel looked at him and he was being completely honest. He was staring into her eyes and Rachel felt herself compelled to answer.

"No it's not weird," She said slowly, "A lot of people like to talk to me. I have a trusting face," She gave a little laugh but it felt awkward in their situation. Puck dropped her hand and nodded before turning away. "Puck," She called. He turned around and looked at her,

"Whenever you want to talk, just ask, I don't mind listening," Rachel saw his mouth tug up into a little smile and he nodded. She was just about to leave when he said,

"Rachel…" Before stopping and taking a breath, "Can you call me Noah?" She looked at him again,

"Of course… can I ask why?"

"Because," He smiled walking forward and brushing a piece of hair out of the way, "It sounds better than calling me Puck. But only you are allowed to call me that." Rachel shivered at the closeness of their bodies. She nodded slowly before saying,

"See you around, Noah," The name rolled of her tongue and Puck swore it was like an angel saying it. He gave her a little smile before nodding,

"See you."

* * *

Rachel packed up her desk for the day and her Dad came by dropping keys on her desk.

"I'm staying a little late," He said, "You can take the car, I'll just get one of the other nurses to drop me off."

"Okay," She said, taking the keys.

She walked out of the office and bumped right into Puck or erm, Noah.

"I'm just going for my session," He mumbled.

"Oh," She said, "Well, yeah that's kind of obvious since you're at my fathers door." She smiled. He blushed slightly before saying,

"I should…"

"Noah," She said right before he was about to enter the room, "Um, my dad and I are very alike… if you get stuck talking to him, just pretend you're to me." He nodded before entering the room.

Rachel smiled before skipping her way out of the building and down the stairs to the car.

"Puck, welcome!" He said as the boy walked into the room. Puck sat down on the chair and the doctor could see that he was trying to make himself relaxed and comfortable but it wasn't really working. He still looked tense.

"So, what are we talking about today?" Puck asked softly.

"Well, I've come to the conclusion that you're not going to answer anything I ask, so you can talk about whatever you want to." The doctor said.

Puck looked around the room before saying, "Is there some way I can listen to music? Or… um play music? Like in a glass room or whatever so you can see and make sure I don't hurt myself and shit… I know you guys take those precautions not saying that I will…" he rambled, "But I had this guitar back home… and I really miss it."

"If you can give us the address, we can get you that guitar. You'll have to play it in the common room, is that okay?" Doctor Berry said, jotting it down, "I can have Rachel retrieve it after school if that's alright?"

"Couldn't I have one of my friends bring it?" Puck asked carefully. He didn't want Rachel going to his house.

"Of course," Doctor Berry said, "So you play guitar… do you play anything else? Sing perhaps?"

"I used too," Puck said, "I was in the Glee Club, didn't get much solo's though… my best buddy did. He was a good singer but not the best. I liked the guitar because… my mom taught me how to play it…" He started tearing up but then he stopped the tears and looked coldly at the doctor.

"Yes?" He prompted but Puck clammed up, then he remembered what Rachel said and pretended to picture her sitting there, long brown hair and big eyes. Her sympathetic (but not condescending smile) and her voice that rang out through the room.

"Um… she taught me how to play it and my sister loved it when I would so I used to practice it all the time. She'd smile and on one side of her face she'd have this dimple which I'd tease her about."

The doctor smiled, he was learning, bit-by-bit about Puck. It was slow progress but it was progress nonetheless. He decided to not let go of the rope that Puck was slow unraveling.

"What did they look like?" Perhaps that was the wrong question, too personal or too vivid for Puck but he clamped his mouth together and stared coldly at the doctor. Even as Rachel, he couldn't bring himself to describe them.

They were… perfect. There weren't enough words in the English language to explain what they looked like, who they were and how much they meant to Puck.

He got up and started walking towards the door without another word to the doctor. He should be used to it by now, but he wasn't and he just stared after in surprise.

He slowly started packing up his bag and notes, calling it a day with Puck. He heard a quiet knock on the door and called,

"Come in!"

Mary, a nurse that worked there slunk into the room, smiling brightly. Berry, smiled back at her before wrapping his arms around her waist and giving her a little kiss.

"Good day?" She asked, surprised by the action. They'd been having an affair for a couple months and it took all her energy to not laugh at Rachel whenever she passed because she had no idea. But she wasn't used to the doctor being so… clingy. Not that she was complaining.

"The session with Puck started off well… ended on a bad note but when does his sessions not?" He said, brow crinkling as he let go of her. She sighed and wrapped herself around him, kissing his neck.

"It'll get better, don't worry… but for now… I can come up with something that will distract you." She smiled evilly and he laughed,

"I can't stay for long, they're expecting me home."

"You really need to come up with better explanations or just divorce the bastard." Mary said, pouting.

"Hey, he's still my husband."

"For now…" She said giving him a kiss.

"For now," he murmured back before kissing her and sliding his hands up and down her body.

* * *

Puck walked up and down the halls, fuming. That was WAY to personal of a question to ask someone. He knew his family just died what made him think that that was a good question to ask?

He should go back and punch him… but he couldn't do that to Rachel, that would break her and he really did like her. She was sweet and somewhat easy to talk to. She didn't baby him… much which was asking for a lot considering everyone else did.

He decided to cut the doctor some slack because he probably was just trailing after the rope that Puck was unintentionally leading. He walked back to the room and knocked on the door but there wasn't an answer. Puck was confused but tried the handle and it was open. He pushed it wide and stopped in his tracks.

He didn't want to hurt Rachel, but apparently _her father _didn't care.

* * *

He ran out the room and was running towards the phone to tell Rachel when he got shoved into a wall.

"Puck, Puck, please listen to me!" The doctor begged, clothes half on.

"No! You're a fucking cheater you dick!" Puck shouted back. There wasn't anyone except for the patients and he didn't care who heard.

The doctor shoved him into a room where no one could hear them, "Puck please. Just…"

"Why are you doing this to her?" He growled, "She loves you and adores you. SHE TRUSTS YOU! And so does your moron of a husband." He flinched but didn't say anything, "See you don't love them! If you did you would've fought back when I said, _moron._ You don't deserve either one of them! I'm telling her!"

"You can't!" He begged.

"Why can't I?" He growled, "You're obviously not going too."

"I will! I promise I will!" He said, but then he stopped groveling and said, "But it's not like she'll believe you anyways."

"I'm not delusional, I don't _see _things. I'm fucking depressed that's why I'm here."

"Yeah, so she'll think you're just trying to ruin her happiness." He said, smirking, "Don't tell her, I'm asking you nicely. I can get you transferred somewhere further and worse than this place. You won't be able to see anyone, anyone and you'll be forced to talk with torture. Doesn't sound so nice?"

"Are you blackmailing me?" Puck sneered.

"No, I'm just telling you the cold, hard facts. I could've had you transferred a while. I'm offering a deal."

"The people who work here are just ask fucked up as their patients." Puck said, but his tone was harsh it was just honest. Berry took that as an agreement before walking out of the room.

Puck stood there and he couldn't help but remember the phrase his sister once taught him,

_Secrets, secrets are no fun. Secrets, secrets, hurt someone._

* * *

__**Thoughts anyone? The review button is lonely! Good, bad, or just okay! Your opinion matters to me! :D xoxo **


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